Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Doing the best I can

My big news is that I will not be returning to my teaching job at Leicester Central School next year. This has been a very difficult decision for me, but I am soooo glad to have finally actually made the decision! Who knows if I made the "right" choice, but I tried my hardest to figure out what was best for me and my family. Most of you know the situation: I am basically working for nothing after paying for daycare, gas, the cost of not having any insurance, etc. . . plus I have been putting in A LOT of time. Teaching is a very unique job and I so admire those who do it well. It is a black hole of work; you are never finished. There is always more you could be doing. And always some child you are really worried about. You are completely responsible for 20-something young people!!! I went into this wanting to change lives. Save people. Hummmm . . . I can barely get them to sit down and do their work. In my short year at LCS I have seen and learned about many shocking things. I truly, truly care about the students. I don't use the work love often or lightly, but honestly I probably do love them in a way. Even those who have kicked rocks at me, thrown full out tantrums and been dragged out of the classroom, told me I never teach anything . . . Those who whine and fight and gossip and don't do their work. Some of them come from home situations I can't even imagine. Even just learning about the realities of the school system has been eye opening.

All in all, it has been an amazingly hard year, with some successes. I am glad to have had this experience. I am not sure what my next move will be, but I have many interests and look forward to whatever comes next! Is it too much to ask for a job where I can help people AND make a little money? And, maybe even have some time for a personal life?


JG said...

Ruth I am so proud of you! And I'm so excited to see what comes next for you. :)

Anonymous said...

Ruth, you think--and write--well, you'll figutre and something and thanks for letting us know how it goes.

JG, nice comment of yours here, too.